Twilighted
by alliepaula
Summary: Anastasia Knightly knows Twilight is not a good book. So why is it that after the worst night of her life, she wakes up in a purple room with no memory of how she got there? What will she make of her new reality, and how will Forks react to her?
1. Shooting Stars and Champagne Bottles

**Twilighted **

**Shooting Stars and Champagne Bottles**

Hello everyone, to answer your unspoken question, yes, I am still writing The Lion and The Badger, but I just needed a break from it I think. I have too many thoughts and too much going on in my life at the moment, and I'm also a little ADHD so my focus is sporadic at times. So, to procrastinate and actually post something vaguely resembling good writing, I've written this; a fanfic of twilight. It was going to happen sometime, I just hope it's good.

Enjoy?

Love, a Frazzled and Procrastinating Paula

Oh! Before I forget, there is some rather bad language in here because the protagonist gets really ticked off.

**Playlist:**

Tik Tok- Ke$ha

Should've said no- Taylor Swift

Fall For Anything- The Script

F*** You- Lilly Allen

Mean- Taylor Swift

It Ends Tonight- The All-American Rejects

Boston- Augastana

Fake Friends- Joan Jet

La La Lie- Jack's Mannequin

Liquid Confidence- You Me At Six

Through The Dark- KT Tunstall

* * *

><p><em>You, with your words like knives and your swords and weapons that you use against me,<em>

_You, have knocked me off my feet again got me feeling like I'm nothing._

_You, with your switching sides and your wild fire lies and your humiliation,_

_You, have pointed out my flaws again as if I don't already see them._

_**Mean; Taylor Swift**_

_Guess what I'm done  
>Writing your book<br>The ending got twisted around  
>But for all the hell that it took<em>

I've got friends who  
>La La Lie<br>Will help me pull through  
>La La Lie<br>La La La Lie

_**La la lie; Jack's Mannequin**_

* * *

><p>"Nastya, have you seen my dictionary?" yelled my sister from her room.<p>

"It's on the third shelf, next to the biological reference thingie!" I shouted back at Tatiana. While I was out partying late tonight with my friends, she'd be home studying. Sometimes I wondered whether there was a mix-up in the order we were born in. She was the responsible one; a conscientious student, OCD over being neat, and she always took care of me when I got home a little tipsy. She should have been the older, wiser sister; not me. I was the wild, free-spirited younger sibling who would disappoint her parents and be the main character in all of the stories my sister and friends would tell one day. I needed taking care of, Tati didn't.

From my room across the hall, I watched her go through the large bookcase that we stored all our textbooks, dictionaries and old school books in. It was nice to be so close to my sister- both geographically and in our relationship. I liked being able to yell across the passage that separated our rooms if I needed her help or to tell her goodnight. It was only when she was studying and I was trying to learn a new dance that the proximity of our rooms became a problem. She'd soon found a way to fix this of course- I had to write down all my dance practice times and when I had to go to rehearsals on the large calendar on the door to my room in _bright_ purple pen. Once this happened I realised how useful it was to have all the dates down. So began Tati's lessons in organisation. Sadly this did not include time management with getting dressed. It was quite literally impossible for me to be ready in five minutes; those miracles were beyond me. Speaking of which- glancing at the clock above my mirror, I realised I was already meant to be there.

_Damn it! Why do you insist on running away from me, Time? Aren't I a nice person?_

It was Daisy's (one of my three best friends) birthday, and not only would she kill me if I was really late, but I was overly excited to give her my gift- I couldn't get to her house fast enough. It was a bit lavish, but I knew she'd love it. It was not opulent or caked in diamonds and stuff, but it had been custom made so it was pretty expensive. I'd spent weeks agonising over the design, trying to think if she'd prefer swirls to flowers, silver to white gold. I leant more towards silver, but that tarnished with time, and I wasn't sure I wanted a memory of our friendship to tarnish. That just seemed mean-spirited to wish our relationship would wear over time and look 'bad' to some people. So it was white gold with swirled vines and a few flowers (daisies of course). It now lay on my bed wrapped in the Tiffany turquoise paper which had been a bitch to stick down. I wasn't great with doing things with my hands- my handwriting was a testament to that- but I'd never thought it would be so hard to wrap a present.

I gave myself a final once-over in my full length mirror and smirked; I loved being me.

I had on bright blue All Stars with lyrics scribbled all over them in my sister's beautiful looped handwriting (Mercy, by OneRepublic), and a navy blue dress. Said dress had a wide, black sash, and a layered skirt that grazed a few inches above my knee. It was strapless, sequined, and made me feel like a million bucks. And you felt as good as you dressed; point of fact is that I never liked getting into unflattering clothes. Even my sweats had to look as good as possible. Yeah it was superficial and shallow to put so much importance on appearances, but as long as people had eyes, looks would always count for a lot.

My dark brown hair was curled nicely, falling to my shoulders in waves, framing my pretty little face. It had been a mission to do that- my hair was lovely; it did exactly what I wanted it to, until I actually wanted it to do something. It had taken large white mountains of mouse and my amazing hair-nazi-instant-gorgeousness spray for it to behave._ I showed it who was boss. _My hazel eyes were rimmed in a shimmery black liner that made them pop (I was vain okay, but even if I were modest I would know my eyes were gorgeous), and I had on a light pink lip gloss, and tiny bit of blush because my skin was pretty pale and didn't give me that rosy glow I longed for. The only thing left was to grab my bag which held the necessities and my jewellery -I never seemed to have time to put it on at home. Earrings that looked like angel wings (custom made of course), and a few rings of assorted stones set in silver; opal, sapphire, amber, lapis lazuli, and moonstone.

It was quirky, it was beautiful; it was me.

"The word I want isn't in here!" she cried, hyperventilating. I turned and saw her pacing her room, the dictionary in her hands with pages flicking so fast they blurred.

I sighed and skipped over to her, "what's the word?"

"Extemporaneities," she said.

_Yea-ow, that's a mouthful._

I grimaced, "don't know that one, sorry."

She huffed and dropped the book on the ground. It made a nice big _thwak _on the pale wooden floorboards.

"What's the point of a damn dictionary if it doesn't have the word you're looking for?" she exclaimed.

"To you vex you no end?"

"Har har," she said, eyes rolling freakishly like mine did.

I grinned at her and whipped out my phone, typing the word into Google.

"Extemporaneities; inhibitions, reticence, discretion."

Tati sighed and smiled at me, "what would I do without you?"

"Write a strongly worded letter to the dictionary people?" I grinned, and then took out my camera. I was about to get a candid shot when she glanced at me.

"Uugh, Nastya, you know I hate photos."

"But why? You look so good in them!"

My sister was one of those disgustingly photogenic people who just can't have a bad picture taken if they tried. And I'd tried alright, resorting to sneaking snaps of her while she was eating. She just looked super seductive. It kinda killed me a bit inside. When I was eating, I looked like the Hulk going after someone's head, or a rabid Chihuahua. Not sure where the Chihuahua bit came from but oh well. Truly, the only problem I had with my sister (other than her insistence that clothes were not meant to be left lying around when the wearer was too tired to do anything but stumble into bed) was that she was so perfect I wanted to hate her, but she was so lovely I couldn't hate her. It was beyond irritating.

Click click click.

"Nastya! Come on, you'll be late!" she said, covering her face with her arms.

I grinned and inspected the photos, "this is a nice one. "

She rolled her eyes and put her head on her shoulder- yes, my younger sister was half a head taller than me. Laugh all you want, but I was the one who got our mom's cool eyes- they were anywhere from green, gold or brown. Hers were (an admittedly lovely) deep brown with gold flecks. I used to envy her eyes so much, until I realised I could make mine different colours depending on the light and what colour I lined them with.

"You're right, it is nice."

I smiled and hugged her goodbye, and then took off down the stairs, bag, camera and my new iPhone in hand (dad managed to score me and Tati free ones from work). I poked my head into the kitchen and noted Mom was at the stove with Greta our housekeeper, no doubt picking out some mouth-watering concoction for tonight, and told them I was off. Then it was a matter of sprinting to Dad's home office and quietly cracking open the door to tell him. He was on the phone as per usual. I waved to him, letting him know I was leaving now, he raised his hand to wave, but paused mid-way, glancing at his watch, and frowned.

"It takes time to look this fabulous," I said with a smile, then shut the door and went to meet Daz, our new driver. I wasn't quite sure why we got a new one, but I wasn't really included in these kinds of decisions.

"Running late again Miss Anastasia?"

"Well I have to make an entrance don't I?" I replied with a grin. I only let people I really knew and liked call me Anja- that was a personal nickname, not some title to be tossed around like a cheap ball. You had to earn the right to be that familiar with me. Besides, my name is regal, so I like hearing it- yeah yeah I know; I'm arrogant, so what? At least I'm not some frightened little mouse who thinks she's ugly and stupid.

We were on the road and in the fast moving traffic soon, and I was revelling in the buttery, chocolate leather seats of the BMW dad had just got. With the launch of the iPhone 4 and dad's wonderful new adverts for it, we'd been getting a lot of new stuff lately. We didn't exactly need it- working as the head of advertising at Apple meant my family wanted for nothing, yet dad was always yammering on about the value of a dollar and blah blah blah. Short version of his speeches- it's okay to buy cool new stuff that you really don't need as long as you realise what you're spending your money on, and you work hard.

Mom was sort of the opposite; she could blow a grand in one afternoon and not even remember what she spent it on. She was impulsive, free spirited and loved pretty things to distraction. I was like her, while Tati was like Dad; sensible, punctual, but with a good sense of humour. Mom didn't have a job so much as a hobby- she painted, and sculpted and just generally did a lot with her hands. Dad bought her a little building for her to open up as an Art Gallery. She's been even busier than usual after that. Tati had inherited her artistic talents. I was alright at drawing, I mean, I liked sketching and I was pretty good at drawing eyes and basic facial structure, but once again Tati bested be in that department. She was so talented; I swelled with pride every time she asked me to sit for her. _Me,_ sit as a model for her. Mum was much better because I fidgeted so much, but she claimed that when she was drawing me she always felt good. I've got a few of her sketches on my walls, all in lovely gold frames around my bed. The one thing that bothered me about her mountains of talent? She was far too modest. She blushed every time I boasted of them, and kicked up a huge fuss when I wanted some of her sketches framed. If I had half her talent, I'd make sure people knew about it. Then again, I was the dancer; no one, but _no one_ upstaged me in dancing. I didn't much like ballet, but I still kicked butt. My tap was enough to send Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire back to their tutors, and my hip hop- well, I was amazing.

Not that I bragged.

Well, only a little when people doubted me. Whenever I got a compliment, I always said 'I know right?' and laughed and said thank you and would find something to compliment them on. I knew I was quite cocky, but I kept my ego in check generally. I think. I hope.

"Miss Anastasia?"

"Hmm?" I'd zoned out as usual. I needed to pay more attention to when people were talking to me.

Daz smiled, "we're nearly there, I said. Where did you go off to?"

I grinned back, "away with the fairies again, sorry. They just like kidnapping pretty things you see," and I laughed to show I was making fun, not fishing for a compliment. Daz laughed too, and we spent the last few minutes chatting about our favourite childhood fairytales. I'd always been more for the twisted gothic type- where fairies were cunning and cheeky things and princesses faced great challenges and evil on their own before they got their happily ever after. So basically I like the original stories Disney modelled their versions on. Everything else was just too…. Bubble gummy. Too perfect, for me. That's why Harry Potter will always, _always_ be my favourite book series. It had true grit, and was so much like the world we lived in. That, and who wouldn't want to read about magic and a school like Hogwarts?

Pulling up to Daisy Stersen's house was akin to reaching a second home for me. A home with a gate covered in pink. Pink balloons, glitter, ribbons, bows, and all manner of girly paraphernalia. I wrinkled my nose; I liked pink, but Daisy adored it. To excess.

"I take it there's a party going on?" joked Daz.

"Could be," I said and hopped out of the car and onto the pavement. I turned to smooth my dress and wave goodbye to Daz. Skipping up the pathway to the front door, I put on my jewellery (forgot to do it in the car. Silly me). There was time for one quick swipe of lipgloss and a smile at my reflection as I neared the house.

The door was wide open, two people having entered just before me. Turned away from me was the svelte figure of Louise Stersen; architect and Lady in Varying Shades of White, Brown and Blue. Tonight she had opted for a white skirt, powder blue blouse, pearls and tan pumps.

_Oh Louise, when will you wear something brighter than pastel?_

"Hi Louise," I greeted Daisy's mum. "Where's the birthday girl?"

"Anja! I was wondering when you'd get here," she said with a wink- I wasn't exactly known for my punctuality. "She's in her room with Jayden and Georgia. I'm sure they'd love to know you were here."

I smiled, put my gift on the present pile, and headed for the stairs. Georgia (Georgie) and Jayden (Jayd) were my other two partners in crime.

Jayden and I had bonded over a rather odd circumstances. She'd moved to Boston five years ago from Canada of all places- she assures me she had nothing to do with Justin Beiber and that Canada cannot be held responsible for the error of two of its citizens. However we'd met two years prior to that when we were at the New England Aquarium. My sister loved going there because she loved learning (yeah, she was a weird kid), but I just like looking at all the pretty things- the patters the water made, the fish, and most importantly, the seal show and The Edge Of The Sea touch tank. I loved picking up the gigantic clams and having water fights with my sister- granted we would never get far because the staff were party poopers (how is spraying each other with the water the clams spit at you hurting the animals?). It was during one such visit that I encountered a very bored looking Jayden- her three older brothers were busy moping because they'd missed seeing the sharks get fed, and all poor Jayd wanted was to go and hold a starfish. So I convinced an eight year old Tati it was our duty as Bostonians to help the poor girl. So we snuck up to her and said if she came with us, we could take her to the starfish. Long story short, I got in big trouble for practically kidnapping Jayd when her parents panicked when they couldn't find her. Never mind the fact that we'd told her brothers- they were too upset they'd missed the gore. Well we got a picture of us holding up starfish that day, I still have it in my purse. Then two years later she pitches up at school and hey-presto we're best friend for life. Georgia was an entirely different matter- she'd been in my class for nearly every year, but for some reason we were never friends until I was put into a team with her in PE, she was always so quiet and I was… loud. Very loud. Anyways, on this fateful PE lesson, I learned the hard way that Georgie has a mean serve; she hit me in the eye. We ended up cracking jokes while the nurse gave me some ice. I had a lovely shiner for two weeks, but when it was gone Daisy, Georgie and I were practically inseparable.

As I went up the stairs, proof of this littered the walls. The Stersen's had one of those loft-type designs where all the important stuff (living room, patios, bedrooms, two bathrooms, spa room and two studies)were upstairs, while the kitchen, bathroom and a few other boring rooms for storage and such were down stairs. Of course the kitchen was where I spent most of my time, but Daisy was a health freak like her mom so there was never anything a normal teen would want in there. Which was alright seeing as we weren't normal (blech), but I think the contents of her fridge probably had a total calorie count of 207. Seriously- they had soy milk instead of full-cream or skim. I think it was because of Daisy and her kooky dairy products that I ended up preferring tea over coffee.

In fact, there were at least three shots of us in that kitchen. We were everywhere; ice-skating on Christmas Eve, at the beach near Georgie's summer home in St Barthes. The annual Halloween photos of us in awesome costumes, and a few of us at school sports days and carnivals. We were always in the middle of the action, hardly ever off to the side. I didn't like to wait on sidelines and watch life go by. I wanted to live it.

It was hard to wind my way through people as there were more here than there had ever been before. I said hi, had a short conversation here and there. It was almost impossible to go two steps without being stopped. For a while I was stuck at the snack table, munching on pistachio nuts while I chatted with some school friends, looking around occasionally to see who was here and trying to get to my girls. I was anxious to get away, but the more I talked, the less worried I became. It was a party, and I was only five or so minutes late.

Then I saw just the person I wanted to see; my boyfriend of eight months; Aiden. I'd made some pretty bad choices before Aiden, but now I knew better. He was gorgeous, inside and out. Always holding doors for me, helping me with my books, telling me just how much I meant to him.

Winding through the clumps of people which littered Daisy's living room, I noticed he was standing very close to someone, looking to be in deep conversation. As I got closer, I noted the person seemed to be a girl in a bright purple top. I stopped to great a few friends, wanting to let him finish his conversation before I dragged him off into the nearest corner- I had needs okay? When I turned back he was still standing with her though, his back to me. From this angle it almost looked like-

_No. no no no please Godric no. _I walked urgently towards them and saw it was indeed a she, and that Aiden-

Aiden was… was wrapped in the arms of some skank.

Oh _fuck my life._

This was not happening now. Not on Daisy's birthday, when I was meant to be all happy. Aw shit now I was going to have to kick his arse and then cry when I got home. God I hated being a girl sometimes. Why couldn't I be a guy- they didn't care as much as we did when they caught someone cheating. Bastards.

I marched up to them and tapped Skanky girl on the shoulder. Alright I dug my nail in each time, but they were short so it didn't count. She pulled her tongue from his mouth with a sound like the last remains of a bubble bath being slurped down a drain.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

I smiled, "yes, I'd like to know why your slutty paws are on _my _boyfriend."

Her eyes got big; apparently Aiden hadn't told her he was taken. Well he wouldn't have to worry about that for much longer.

"You said you dumped her!"

_Say _what_ now?_

"Liz, I can explain-"

"What's to explain?" I cut in. "You just got caught lying to her and cheating on me. I think the situation explains itself!"

"Ana-" I couldn't stop myself, my hand rose of its own accord and I slapped him. He was just lucky I hadn't had time to make a fist. He looked at me with a mix of surprise and anger. God he was such a bullshitter! He had no right to be angry!

"I hate you, get out," I said bluntly and pointing to the door.

"You can't-"

"I invited you, and now I'm uninviting you. Get out."

"This isn't even your house!" he cried in frustration.

"It might as well be!" I yelled back. Daisy and I had always been as thick as thieves.

"As for you," I rounded 'Liz' the skank, "you should learn not to date people who are in a relationship. Sadly I did not invite you, so I won't throw you out. I'll get Daisy to."

She narrowed her eyes at me, "I wouldn't just think Daisy is going to do whatever you want, she's not your slave."

I was taken aback for a moment, "Daisy has been my best friend since the second grade, I think she'll understand when I tell her I want you thrown out."

"I'm her cousin; blood is thicker than water and all that."

"Maybe, but friendship is thicker than both, now get away from me before I hurt you."

_Please don't let her realise that's from The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants._

She raised an eyebrow but moved. Bitch.

I fished out my iPod and jammed the earphones into my ears, swinging over to Lilly Allen. I hid inside the closet in the hall that Jayd and I used to pretend was Harry Potter's when we were younger. God I missed those days; the biggest drama in my life was someone being better at handstands than me. I should have known Aiden was just the same as all the other guys I'd dated; he made big mistakes that I'd forgive always because he promised he'd do better. He was so sarcastic that sometimes he hurt me with his comments. He only had two settings; charming and sweet with endearing kisses when we were in public or around my family and friends. Caveman-ish and rough in private, as if he was always trying to get into my pants.

I went through _F*** You_ three times before going back to the party. I had to find Daisy- if rumours started flying I wanted her to know the truth. I also wanted my best friends at my side while I had to smile and laugh like nothing had happened tonight. God Aiden was such a prick! What had I ever seen in that douche?

I found my way to Daisy's room with some trouble- there were so many people that needed to be greeted and charmed along the way, so it was well over half an hour before I got there. I'm not sure which puzzled me more about Daisy- that she wanted to make a grand and dramatic entrance by being late to her own party, or that she'd choose to have her door open so anyone could come in. Surely the whole point was that no one would see her before she was ready. Meh, her choice.

"Hey Daze, don't know if you've noticed, but there's a bunch of people in your house asking for you," I said when I came in. I grinned widely when I saw her- she looked like a princess. Her lovely blonde hair fell in spiral curls past her shoulders, her icy blue eyes were rimmed in gold and lips a sweet pink that matched her floaty mini dress. She wore golden gladiator sandals tucked under her hot pink armchair. I liked Daisy's room, but at the same time it was so pink and girly and frilly I almost wanted to ask her how old she was. Of course I wasn't much better in terms of my closet- I still had a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt I pulled out for special occasions. Georgie and Jayd flanked her sides. Jayd in a shimmering yellow dress that had a long slit up her leg, and next to her was Georgie in a soft green bubble dress with silver pumps. Both of them had their dark brown hair in glossy up-do's.

_Merlin's boxers you three look simply divine._

"I just caught Aiden cheating on me!" was what came out.

I was expecting some sort of sympathy- all I got was a shared look between them all and a few twitching brows. Then they came forward and silently gave me a great big hug- but somehow it wasn't… it didn't feel right. Something was up.

"I'm sorry I dropped it on you like that- it's just, well I don't want to go through it alone and I kinda made a scene and kicked him out. So if the rumour mill starts turning I don't want you guys to be surprised or something." Now was probably not the best time to ask for Daze to throw out her cousin.

They cooed nice things in my ears as they led me over to Daisy's big poofy bed, rubbing my back for a while. Their touches were different than usual- almost distant. Maybe their nails were wet, though I didn't smell the familiar fumes of nail-polish. _They probably want to get to the party- you're holding them up._

I stretched a stiff smile onto my face and tried to sound chipper, "we'd better go out there and great the people huh? They're probably wondering where you are Daze." My hand was on the knob, waiting to go out there and forget about all this, but I heard no movement behind me. I turned to see them all still sitting on the bed. It looked like glamorous movie stars holding court or something.

Daisy nudged Georgie, who looked like she was about to be shot.

"What's wrong Georgie? You alright?" she looked uncomfortable, like there was something strangling her from the inside. I must have been too caught up in my own drama to notice. I smiled encouragingly; she needed to get this off her chest. _Might as well get all the dirty laundry out before the party starts so we can have a good time._

"Ana, we um. Well we feel that – that you're… that we're not the right friends for you anymore."

She'd always hated opening up and confrontation- I had a hunch it was because she was so shy generally.

_Wait a sec- what did she just say?_

"We feel like we've grown up a lot over the past few years," said Georgie, shifting from foot to foot.

"Wh-what?" the ground felt less sturdy then it was a minute ago.

"Ana, we just don't click anymore. I mean, you're just… we've grown up. You haven't; you want to climb trees and pretend you can do spells and just generally mess around like a ten year old," interrupted Jayd.

I think my eyes were going to pop out their sockets. What the hell was going on here?

"Huh? I don't get it- is this a joke or something? Because it's really not funny."

Georgie looked a bit abashed; Jayd looked impatient.

"It's- it's not that we don't like you anymore, it's just that we're not the same people we were when we became friends," stammered Georgie.

"I don't get it," I repeated. "I mean of course you've changed, we all have. I just don't understand why that would make you… would lead to… I- I don't understand why you're saying this!" I said, searching for answers and the right words.

"Because you're a selfish, attention seeking bitch!" cut in Jayd.

_And now the truth comes out. I never knew she had it in her to be that mean. Strike that, I just never knew she could be that mean to _me.

For a brief moment I lost touch with what they were saying, what I was thinking, if I was breathing; all I was aware of was the pounding of my heart as it bled into my chest. What was going on? It was like they were stuffing their hands into me and tearing me apart from the inside.

"We were going to tell you after the party, but…" Georgie trailed off.

"I… I don't mean to be," I began to respond to Jayd's accusation. "I know I'm mean sometimes and I know that I like being in the limelight, but I don't _try_ and steal attention away from you guys-"

"But you do!" said Daisy. "Even tonight, on _my _birthday, you are stealing my thunder. "

"How am I doing that?" I asked pleadingly.

"You just _had _to announce that Aiden was cheating on you tonight, with my cousin no less! And then you _throw him out!_" Each word was drawn out, finishing in a clipped tone. It was like she was trying to hit me with them.

"Because he was! When else would I tell you? Next week when I see him wrapped in _another _sk- person's arms? I can't control what other people do!"

"You didn't have to throw him out!"

"Well what was I meant to do Daisy? Let him go on kissing her and just stand there? Pretend I didn't know while everyone started talking about it?"

"You just can't let anyone else have fun, can you?" shouted Jayd

"What?" now that was just ridiculous. I _made sure_ everyone had fun. I noticed now that I had folded my arms at some point and was now giving myself an unintentional hug. _I damn well need one!_

"You always have to have the biggest smile, the loudest laugh. Be the first one to get on a ride; it's all a competition to you," Georgia said in a low voice. As if saying it a little quieter would hurt less.

"And you can never let anyone be the star of the show, it's always you you you! Upstaging us, stealing the show, getting all the glory," screamed Daisy.

Slowly I nodded, knowing I did tend to hog the spot light. I just couldn't help it- but I wasn't this monster they made me out to be! I wasn't…

"I know I've done that once or twice. Maybe a few times, but never-"

"It's not just tonight, Ana, it's every time you're around! You're always doing something crazy and different that the rest of us can't compete with," said Jayd.

"What do y-"

"You climb trees and dance like a professional lunatic in public. You dress up like you don't care what anyone thinks, like you just throw on whatever comes to your hands, but you take so long doing it that we know it's all a calculated plan. Then you make huge scenes, like throwing Aiden out, and what about last week? You found that pair of white lace gloves and started calling everyone 'my dear lady' or 'my good sir'. It was humiliating!"

"Why is climbing trees so bad? And I thought you thought it was funny when I did that, I even threw in a curtsy just for you! I don't understand," I choked, trying to get the fire in the back of my throat to calm the hell down and leave me alone.

"You constantly belittle our achievements," spat out Jayd. "Whenever I talk about something amazing that I've done, you always come right back with something better."

"It's always got to be about you," said Daisy stonily.

The way they were listing these things, it sounded like they were reciting a speech. Had they been practising? Waiting to do this at just the right moment? How long had this gone on for? How long had they hated me? I didn't understand. Everything had been fine; I'd never even suspected they felt this way. How could I not have noticed?

"We're sick of it, Ana."

"Yeah, we're not taking your shit anymore," clarified Georgia. If the situation were not so horribly serious, I might have laughed- I'd never heard Georgia swear.

I looked from one to the other, totally lost. _Have I really been so careless? Have I become such a monster?_

"Oh don't look at us like that, you have had this coming for years," Jayden hissed.

I didn't understand, why were they saying this? I hadn't done half the things they'd said on purpose, it was just who I was. I had never tried to take anything away from them, let alone their glory.

I couldn't deal with this now. Every single nerve was telling me to get the hell out of there, and my eyes were so hot I was probably blubbing already. I wouldn't let them see me cry, I wouldn't! However I felt a fat bead of liquid slide down my face just then. Fuck it. I wiped it away sullenly, and looked at their feet because my eyes weren't strong enough to meet their anymore. I opened my mouth slightly, then licked my lips to try and lure the words to my mouth. What could I say? A spiteful part of me wanted to hurl abuse back at them, to defend myself. But even hough I felt my heart bleeding and falling apart from their words, I couldn't bring myself to hurt them.

"Are you finished?" I asked eventually. There was a tense pause. I looked up briefly and almost laughed. I knew these girls inside out, I knew every tiny nuance of expression. And now I could see that they were back peddling furiously to try and detatch themselves from the murder they had commited. They too could see my heart bleeding, see a part of my drawing its last breath. And while I doubted they were sorry they'd done this to me, I could see in their eyes a need to wash the blood from their own hands. They wanted this for me, they just didn't want to admit to their part in it. Fucking spineless cowards.

"Ana-"

"You don't get to call me that anymore," I snapped, eyes pining them where they stood. I drew in a shakiy breath and with it the last of my strength. I stood defiantly and looked at them. My head was high, my tears had stopped flowing but still dripped from my chin, and my fists clenched at the sides.

"Are you finished?" I repeated. They murmured 'yes', and began to lower their own eyes. "Happy birthday, Daisy."

Her eyes flicked up to mine again in surprise. "I hope you all enjoy the party." Now they were all looking at me. Good. I wanted them to see me leave. I wanted them to watch me go. I was an attention seeker after all.

The second I was on the other side of the door, I was in a world that had ceased to exist to me. The music was loud and upbeat, there were tons of people talking and laughing, and the sound of glasses clinking and the usual jumping of dancers echoed throughout the space. It was a world oblivious to how mine had just imploded. The only thing I wanted was to go home and weep into my pillow like the little weakling I was. All false bravado and courage was gone, now I was just a little girl who desperately needed to get out of this place. I half ran from the room and headed down the stairs. I walked past smiles and laughs, people in great outfits all shiny and ready for a good time. Squeezing unnoticed through a crowd had never been a wish of mine, well not unless I was playing hide and seek or something. Even then though, I always wanted to be noticed; there was no fun in anything if you weren't found. Then there was no sport, and you may just as easily have been forgotten or left in favour of better company. God I felt morbid; like an emo at a pep rally watching the cheerleaders smile and get the crowd psyched up.

_How the hell had a … a three minute conversation totally defeated me? This was ridiculous. God my life was going to shit in the space of one evening._

Daisy's mum caught me getting my bag and looked perplexed, "Ana, are you alright?"

I smiled weakly, "I'll survive. I gotta get going L- Mrs Stersen. " _I don't have the right to call her Louise anymore. _"I hope you and your guests have a wonderful time."

She looked worried but offered me a smile, "I'll see you on Friday for the movie night."

The surety in her voice rattled me further, "I don't think so. I'm not exactly welcome anymore," I mumbled quietly.

Now she looked confused. _That makes two of us._ "What do you mean? You're always welcome-"

"Bye Mrs Stersen. Have a good evening."

With that I'd bolted from the house and was heading down to the corner of the road. Mrs Stersen was too good a hostess to leave her daughter's party, so I needn't be worried of her following me.

I walked to the corner and dialled my driver's number. Sure, Daz was surprised to get a call this soon after he dropped me. He was not surprised though when I climbed in, eyes resembling those of a cheetah, with my earphones firmly stuck in and my bottom lip dragging on the ground. He said nothing, and for that I was grateful.

I sat silently in the back of the car staring at the blurred lights, listening to my _Broken Hearts and Tired Souls_ playlist. Funny, I never thought I'd have to listen to it because of my 'friends'. Boys, sure. School and stress, always. Dancing? Sometimes; I wanted to do everything perfectly and do it fast, and it was always frustrating when my teacher was being a bitch, or I didn't get the part I wanted. But never them. They'd always been the ones to help me out of my misery, not push me into it.

"They're not worth it."

"What?" I'd gone over to planet Woop Woop again. This time I wasn't as annoyed with myself. I was more annoyed with Daz for actually talking.

"I said they're not worth it."

"How do you know that?" I fired back. "How do you know it wasn't all my fault? That I was the one to blame, that I brought this all on m-myself because I was a s-stupid, arrogant, att-ttention seeking, immature monster?" By this stage I was fighting not to have a break down. What had I done wrong? When had this all started? Dear God, was there any way I'd be able to make it up to them?

I only knew the answer to the last one; No. Things would never be the same. I'd never again go out with 'my girls' or giggle until the early hours over silly things with them. I'd never get them back. I'd just fucked everything up beyond all repair.

"Because you loved those girls like they were your sisters. Maybe even more. If they can't appreciate you then they aren't worth your time and effort."

It vaguely occurred to me that i hadn't said anything about what had happened really, I just assumed that it was obvious.

I tried to smile a bit, but the curve failed and straightened almost immediately. I pulled my knees up to my chest and hugged my legs. It was a good thing I wasn't wearing heels, or I'd scuff the leather and dad would kill me.

"You're a good girl, Anastasia. Sure you have your faults, but so does everyone. You're kind and compassionate, and I've never seen anyone quite so alive as you. You stick to what you believe, and protect the people you love. I'm not sure what they said, but I know you're a tough girl. You'll pick yourself up from this, and you'll keep going. It's who you are."

Why did he have to be so nice when all I wanted to do was tell him to shut up? That I _was_ a monster, and I wanted to wallow in my misery and self-pity. He was so sweet though, and it meant all the more after what had just happened.

"Thanks Daz. This… this means more than you could know," I said with a tight jaw, my soul so heavy it was nailing me to the dark leather seat. I couldn't move; it just wasn't possible.

Daz didn't know me- he couldn't know what he was talking about.

"It'll be okay. Hey look, a falling star! Make a wish."

I laughed damply, "don't tell me that you believe in that stuff."

I saw his frown reflected in the mirror, "not really, but why not? There's nothing that says it can't happen. Why not take a chance?"

I laughed again in agreement, feeling a bit better. And so, with Augastana's _Boston_ mixing with the engine's low rumble, and my tears dripping from my chin onto my All Stars, I made a wish. A silly wish, a wish that I really wasn't sure would help my situation if it came true- which it wouldn't.

_I wish that something huge could happen in my life. That I could be taken away from all the mess here and start over. _

It was silly really. I didn't want to leave, but I wanted something to happen. Everything was going so right, and then…

I huffed. Then I went and messed everything up. Hell, at sixteen, 80% of people have already found the person they're going to marry. It was a scientific fact. At seventeen, I just lost the people I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

The drive wasn't nearly long enough. I was still miserable with no slight glimmer of positivity when I got home. And when I got through the door, I had to sneak around Mom so she wouldn't ask questions. Tati was the only one I'd let see me cry.

I snuck up the stairs and into my sister's room. The door was open, and she was lying on her bed reading with her back against the pale wooden headboard, totally oblivious to the world around her. For a moment I hesitated- I wasn't sure if I wanted to shatter her little bubble of peace. She was the only one who could help me though, and I knew she'd find out sooner or later. Sniffing, I padded over the creamy carpet and gently shook one of her bare feet.

"Nastya! How was th-" she looked up and say my face. She knew in that instant _exactly _how it had been. She dropped her book and crawled over to me. My legs kind of buckled beneath me as I sat down on the edge of the bed. Her arms encircled me, and she began rubbing my back like she always did when I was unhappy.

"What happened?" she said, her eyes as big as the puffy pillows behind her. She had this look on her face like she was angry at something she was confused about.

"Aiden was cheating on me, and the girls just un-friended me."

Her eyelids flew back even further, brows rose from their 'v', and her lips parted slightly.

"I need chocolate," I said pathetically. "And alcohol."

"Okay," Tati said, still rubbing soothing circles on my back.

"I'm not asking," I said grumpily. My sister was used to me, so she'd understand.

She laughed, "Maybe this is why they left you hmm?"

A knife went through my heart and I blinked a million times before I could glare at her.

"Too soon?" she asked weakly.

"Ya think?" I choked. For all my sister's wisdom, she had little tact. She did however, have speed and knew exactly how to make me feel better. Within minutes she had me propped up on my bed, surrounded by assorted chocolate boxes and a bottle of JC le Roux pink champagne (because it was cooler than the normal stuff), with my Mac (Wendy) playing _A Very Potter Musical._

Escapism was my forte. I didn't like to dwell- I cry if I must, and then look for a distraction.

We laughed and sang along. After our loud rendition of _Dance Again_, My mom came in. She took one look at my face and was suddenly across the room. She held me and asked what was wrong, which just set me off again. She called Aiden a good for nothing loser and went to get me more food. The thing about my mom was that although we didn't spend much time together because of her busy schedule and everything, but I knew she cared. She also made an effort to stay 'hip' for me and Tati. Never mind that using the word 'hip' made you anything but.

I went over every minute of what happened and something hit me- I'd never told Daisy who Aiden was cheating on me with. She'd known. I don't know for how long, but she'd known that Aiden was being a dirtbag, and she hadn't told me. She'd known that her cousin was whoring around with my boyfriend and she'd decided that I deserved to have it happen to me.

This little epiphany just made me cry harder, which made me more frustrated, which just made me even more upset. After a while I was hiccupping so badly that Tati had to tell Mom the story.

By eleven I was exhausted, and so they left me alone to get some sleep. I didn't go to sleep though. I just sat on my bed drinking glass after glass of champagne, not caring about how sore my head would be tomorrow. I didn't want to fall asleep remembering any of this.

Unfortunately all that crying mad me far too tired to try and burry the memories sitting up. Lying down with my head on the pillow, I glared out my window at the sky. Why did it look the same as every other night? Why was the world the same? Surely something should show how totally upside-down my own little world was? The fatigue started coming in stronger, and at a point I think I might have been drifting in and out of consciousness, because suddenly the twinkling stars turn into laughing party guests, all mocking my situation. The moon was a huge disco ball, it's beam a strobe light. The laughter got louder and the stars got strobe light got brighter.

"Stop it," I muttered. "Stop laughing." But the laughing turned into screaming, and the screaming turned into harsh words being hurled like daggers by my 'friends'. The pounding beat of the music was now in time with the hurtful words, and every beat seemed to tear a little further into me.

Behind my lids the light was growing blinding, the pain in my heart drove me to the brink of insanity and back, running red lights the whole way.

"Please," I whimpered to the empty air, which suddenly lacked oxygen. "Go away. Just leave me alone."

I felt warm tears glide across my cheeks, let out a muffled cry, and buried my face into the pillow, half thinking that suffocation may be a kinder fate than having to wake up.

My body felt heavy, and then weightless. With the weightlessness came a searing sensation, as if I was being burned alive. There was no air to breathe, no voice to scream with, and the only thing I saw was a blinding grey light. How the hell a _grey_ light was blinding I don't know.

Then everything abruptly stopped. I felt the bed beneath me, the air around my face as I gulped it in, saw dark shapes outlined in my room, and heard the sounds of the house settling, and my sister's breathing across the hall.

I brought my hand up to my face, expecting cold sweat, as I always had when I had a nightmare. There was nothing, my skin was freezing, but nothing more. Still panting, I lay back down and rolled over.

Memo to self; no more self-pitying booze parties before bed. That shit messes with your mind.

* * *

><p><em>Oh my god! The lights! Somebody turn out the goddamn lights!<em> I hastened to pull the sheet over my face, and attempted to avoid consciousness.

_Ouch… Ugh my head hurts, and why was everything pounding?_

I cracked open an eye and realized that it was raining heavily outside.

I smiled slightly, I liked the rain. Through my sheet the light wasn't nearly as bad, and as my eyes adjusted to it, I sighed, wishing I hadn't woken up so fully. Now I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep.

With a groan I pushed back the sheet and tried not to cry out when my feet hit the floor of ice. Where was my heater? I groggily turned around in a circle confused as to what I was doing. I decided to forget the heater as my bladder had just decided it couldn't hold out for very long. I walked two steps and stopped. My mini couch was meant to be at the foot of my bed with my slippers. Where the hell had it gone? I blinked. Why the hell was there no carpet on my floor? I have two in my room. Had mom decided to redecorate while I slept? My blood started to simmer. My room was my sanctuary, no one messed with it. Ever. I'd deal with her after I went to the bathroom.

Two more steps and I stopped again. This time my eyes widened and I was totally awake. I spun around. What the hell was going on? This isn't my room!

_Crap!_

I turned around again. The room was purple, dream catchers hung from the ceiling and old crayon drawings that I certainly hadn't done, papered the walls. A weird cardboard tube painted like a bad imitation of an African… something, was in the corner. A very battered teddy bear sat in an old rocking chair, staring back at me. As if _I_ was the weird thing here.

_What the spell is going on here?_

I looked at the ancient PC and the dusty computer stand.

_No way in hell is that mine, Wendy is one of my best friends. _

Oh my god, I hadn't swapped bodies or something had I? No way in hell could I deal with that right now. I spun around three times, trying to locate a mirror. Rushing to the cupboard I flung open the door and- thank God- found a full length one on the inside of one of the doors. I looked in the mirror and took stock- I was still me.

_Thank you, God._

I looked down to see my Harry potter shirt and green silk pyjama pants.

Right, now to find something which had a date on it. There was a calendar on the dusty desk, proclaiming it was in fact still August, and I don't think anyone forgets to change their calendars for over a decade, so presumably I was in the same year.

Well, at least I hadn't turned into a time-traveller or something. That might have freaked me out a little bit more.

I looked properly around the room now, taking note of the creepy teddy, an old pink sock, and a wardrobe filled with boxes and fishing reels. There were some pictures aside from the crayon drawings. Photographs of trees, and a lake, and a really tiny chinchilla, and a few of people I didn't know. Suddenly my eyes zeroed in on the farthest left, in a white frame. That picture stood out from the rest: a picture of a very grumpy little girl dressed in a tutu, and two adults. A girl with Chocolate brown eyes, brown hair, and a smiling mother.

Shit.

"No. No this _can't _be happening. I don't even _like_ Twilight!"

What the _hell_ is going on here? Why was I in what presumably had to be Bella Swan's room? This was not okay. This was NOT right.

Maybe I was having a night terror or something.

I pinched myself _hard_; I had to wake up from this. I could not be living out some silly Twihard adventure. I had long ago realised that Twilight was poorly written with Mary-Sue characters, old and cliché plot lines and far too much glitter for my liking. Granted I'd thought it was amazing at first, but I knew better now. I knew that it wasn't real literature, and I knew Stephenie Meyer was a pathetic authoress.

So why the hell was I in some twisted reality where I was living out some screaming Edward fan's dream?

_Breathe, Anja, breathe. It's going to be ok. You'll be laughing about this soon enough._

What do I do? How the hell am I getting out of here? How in the name of all that is good and chocolatey did I even _get _here?!

Cell phone; I needed my phone. Maybe someone had sent me a message or I'd told someone that I was going to find a way into a teen novel.

_God, I must have been _really _drunk if I chose 'Twilight'_. I finally found my phone stuck in my shoe of all places. I held it up and tried to turn it on, but it stubbornly refused to resurrect itself. Damn, no battery.

Right, if I found a phone, I could call my parents, and have them fetch me. They had to exist, even if I was stuck in a book, right?

I shook my head- this was all some weird alcohol induced dream. I wasn't really here. This wasn't real. Even if it was, I was getting the hell out. I just need to go and find a phone, call Tati, and get my ass out of here.

I slowly crept down the stairs, flinching at the cold floorboards. Had they never heard of heating?

Oh wait, this was Forks, chilling, boring and above all, _wet._ From the way Meyer described it, it sounded like a gloomy, boring rainforest.I mean, I really like the rain, but it just wasn't healthy to have this weather so often when you weren't in Europe.

"There you are Anastasia," said a cheerful voice. A voice that sounded slightly gruff, like there was one small piece of loose gravel stuck in a voice box. It was a pleasant voice, one that could belong to only one person. Character. Whatever.

Slowly I turned on my heel to meet six brown eyes. My own hazel ones bugged out of my head. There was no way. There was just _no way_ this was happening.

"You alright there, Anastasia?" asked a man with a bushy moustache. A man dressed in a police uniform with a worn brown leather jacket and slightly thinning hair.

Charlie Swan, chief of police.

* * *

><p>Right, so I know that was a lot happening really really fast, but I wanted to start with a boom. For visuals, Anja (pronounced ah-un-ya) is Lucy Hale, and her sister Tatiana is Selena Gomez. Any ideas for what her parents could look like would be great.<p>

* * *

><p>The New England Aquarium and the attractions I mentioned are real, and if you are heading out to Boston or live there (Ah! I have people all over the world reading this! How cool?) any information would be great. Yes I know we've now moved to Forks, but come on, Anja's going to be homesick.<p> 


	2. The Forks?

**Twilighted**

**The Forks?**

Second chapter! Yay! My sincerest apologies for not uploading another chapter of L&B, I'll do as soon as I'm able. It's the last year of high school so I'm freaking out a bit. This chapter uses the f-word extensively, given Anja is prone to swearing. Besides, I think she deserves to be cut some slack- would you care about your potty mouth if you were in her shoes?

After long hours of googling Forks (the shame….), I have come to realise that the place is actually quite pretty. It's old too, which I wasn't expecting. Although I'm a city slicker so I prefer shiny new buildings, and my lip curls whenever I see corrugated iron, it's still not a bad looking place. So with that in mind, don't think that I'm hating on Forks or the US or what/wherever because of how Anja describe things. The placement of the 'Welcome to Forks sign' is somewhat of a mystery. Some sources say there are two; one at the north and south sides of town. Other pictures show it seemingly within the town itself, with shops around it. I'm hoping this technicality won't bother you, as I got frustrated and gave up cutting, pasting and re writing links to the scene there.

Are we enjoying the playlists? Also, I have visuals for some of the chapters on polyvore . com, just search twilighted alliepaula in 'sets'. I also tend to make sets of chapters I haven't even written yet because I get all these ideas, so if you want to play Alice and see into the future, check it out .

**Playlist:**

The Worst Hangover Ever- The Offspring

Help!- The Beatles

Mistakes I haven't made- A Rocket To The Moon

Fear Of Flying – A Rocket To The Moon

Baba O'Riley (Teenage Wasteland)- The Who

* * *

><p><em>I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when their right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.<em>

_**- Marilyn Monroe**_

_Who do you trust when no one seems real anymore?_

_**- Unknown**_

_What the devil is going on here?!_

_**- Snape, A very Potter Sequel**_

* * *

><p>"You alright there, Anastasia?" asked a man with a bushy moustache. A man dressed in a police uniform with a worn brown leather jacket and slightly thinning hair.<p>

Charlie Swan, chief of police.

* * *

><p>"Yeah," I emitted a horrible squeak, and coughed to clear my throat. "Um, yes. I'm fine."<p>

He nodded, brow still puckered.

_What kind of fuckery is this?_ Inside my brain a major nuclear meltdown was happening. All the little people inside it were screaming obscenities, and ramming into the walls of my sensitive skull. I don't think I've ever been truly hung-over before, but if this is what it's like, I'll never get drunk again.

Drunk. Oh God what the hell was going on? Was this some kind of booze influenced dream? No that wasn't it- I was already going to have a bruise on my arm from pinching myself. Was I hallucinating?

Oh Godric's socks, I was high, wasn't I? I'd broken into the medicine cabinet and OD-ed on cough medicine or something. I was a druggie. Oh my god what the hell had I done?! I was a drunken druggie stuck in a drug induced dream of a teen novel. A really _bad_ teen novel.

"Sorry we woke you," came another deep voice.

My eyes darted to the two other people in the room. Jacob and Billy Black, both seemed entirely unaware of my inner meltdown. So far Stephenie Meyer was right with one thing; descriptions. Jacob was a little bit taller than Charlie and had his hair pulled back into a pony tail- ick. There are few men who could pull off that look, and Jacob wasn't one of them. Still, those big dark eyes made me feel comfortable and gooey as I looked at him.  
>Wow, now I remember why I was team Jacob (I mean c'mon, Edward was <em>so<em> overrated); those eyes sent a blistering heat all over my skin, and even though he wasn't all muscly yet, he had a nice body.

_Rein it in now girl, it would not be a good plan to throw your lips on his at the first meeting. Not in front of his dad and chief Swan anyway. He'd probably charge you with sexual assault._

God what was I thinking? I suppose it was ok seeing as I was high though. Did drug addicts have an increased libido? How long exactly does it take to come down from a high? Would I feel myself descending or something? I suppose I should enjoy myself while it lasted, the aftermath would not be pretty. And Jacob was just so yummy.

Except…. Except that damn ponytail was grossing me out. A lot. Why would you do that? I mean, some people can pull off long hair, but generally it was curly then, like Antonio Banderas, or Ben Barnes… Jacob Black? Not so much. I wonder if it would be weird for me to suggest a haircut…. Just so that he couldn't plait it. There was something a wee bit wrong when a guy in the twenty first century has hair long enough to French braid. Although I really wouldn't mind doing that and taking pictures before he cut it. It would give me enough black mailing material for the rest of his life.

_Black mailing, 'Black' hahaha-_

"Oh, Anastasia, this is Billy and Jacob, I told you about them, right?" Clearly Charlie had caught me ogling the two people in his…. Living room? Oh dear God, I was hallucinating about being in Charlie Swan's living room. His very small, washed out and _smelly_ living room. Seriously, what did the guy use as room spray? Eau de cheesy socks?

"Ye-es?" I said, but it sounded more like a question.

This wasn't real. This just couldn't possibly be real. It wasn't possible! I'm pretty sure the laws of physics would prevent this from happening; physics always seemed to come up in time travelling movies and sci-fi.

_Alright, relax Anja. Nothing is going to happen to you. You are totally fine. You just magically flung yourself into Twilight, nothing to panic about. You'll get out of this._

Charlie was giving me an odd look, and I think they'd finally noticed me hyperventilating. Right, I've got to play it cool. Be calm, play along for now. Look at Billy and don't scream. He's not scary, even if he lets his son wander around with a ponytail. He's not going to turn into a clown or something. It's all just an illusion, a drunken, drugged up nightmare that you are going to wake up from somehow.

And then find a bathroom. A bathroom is a necessity.

Billy was a fairly strong looking man, even juxtaposed with the wheel chair. He offered his hand and I shook it as firmly as possible. Dad always said you could tell a lot about a person by their handshake. Billy's told me that his hands were warm, direct and all too real for my liking. There was no hesitation as he took my pale little hand in his, and smiled.

"Nice to meet you Anastasia, Charlie here told us all about you," said Billy.

_What could Charlie know about me? And why does everyone keep using my name? That isn't normal. I barely ever use someone's name when I talk to them. It's when you talk _about_ people that you use their names. When you're bitching about someone who has given you no reason to hate them. When friends turn against each other and scream and throw words like daggers._

I unintentionally flinched at the thoughts. And when I flinched, my bladder nudged me uncomfortably.

"Sorry," chuckled Billy, "sometimes I don't know my own strength."

I let out the weirdest staccato laugh, and then abruptly shut my mouth. My head was just hurting, that's all. I was totally fine. Or at least I would be once I had some water and an aspirin. And a toilet.

I shook Jake's hand, and he blushed a bit. Well I knew I was pretty, but first thing in the morning? And freaking out because I'm in a fictional world? Please! I looked more like a rabid animal. If only the hall mirror wasn't behind him, the image of his damned pony tail and the glaring light was hard to look at, especially with my hangover. And I was hungry. I needed to get a really greasy, deep-fried breakfast into me. With three eggs, hash browns, sausages, and bacon.

_Mmmm, bacon would be _so _good right now…_

"Er, Anastasia, would you like to get dressed? It's a bit chilly here..." Charlie trailed off and looked towards his shoes.

I had forgotten I was in my pyjamas. Meh, I was well covered. Still a bit cold in the draughty house, but well covered. Unless of course-

My gaze snapped down to my chest. _Ow, ow, ow, no sudden movements now, your neck is sti-_

_Shit!_ No wonder he was telling me to cover up! It was evident from just looking at my body's reaction to the temperature how cold I was finding it. That, or I was aroused by the thought of bacon. I folded my arms hastily.

_So that's why old Jakey boy had blushed. What a perv. Then again he was a guy, so really it stood to reason that he would look. Guys were, in general, pervs. Especially at this age._

"I'm… going to go put some warmer clothes on," I said slowly and jabbing my thumb towards the stairs without uncrossing my arms. The men nodded, and I nodded, and it was all together a very quiet moment that may have been awkward for some. That was one of my many strengths; an immunity to awkward moments. And a bladder of steal. God I needed a bathroom.

I went up the stairs as fast as possible in my hung-over state, and started doing that jogging on the spot/side-step jig I like to call the toilet dance. I did this little number over to two doors in the hallway before finally- finally!- finding the bathroom.

Back in the purple lair, my bladder relieved, I wondered exactly what I was going to wear. I couldn't just go back down in my pj's, and I would be damned if I had to wear something of Bella's. She was just not going to have anything remotely suitable. She hadn't been here in years anyway, right? So I'd only have tiny pink tutus and some manky shirts. Manky _Bella_ shirts, ick.

I shaded my eyes because the room was despicably bright, and started looking for something familiar.

Five minutes and a trashed room later, nothing was found. I was slowly being blinded by the sun's fuck-I'm-so-cheerful rays, the lair of the beast was barely recognisable, and there was not one single article of my clothing in sight. Not that it said much given my sight was going as fast as my temper was rising.

"Where the HELL is my stuff?!" I fumed. I kicked out wildly at the bed, regretting it the minute my three middle toes made contact with the hard box underneath.

"Holy Mother of FFFFFFFFF-" I smothered my obscenities and clutched my poor, throbbing foot in my hands. _Guess I deserved that. What the hell was in those boxes anyway?_

I rubbed my toes until the throbbing faded, and got down to investigate.

I could smack myself. I'd ransacked the room, pulling things out of cupboards and tipping out drawers. Did I check under the bed? Of course not. My black trolley-bag was there, fit to burst with my things. "Thank you God, now if you could just _get me the hell outta here_!"

It took me a moment to realise that I'd said that out loud. Meh, it wasn't loud enough to make my ears ring, so no one would have heard it.

Taking a deep breath, I tried form a plan in my still fuzzy and thoroughly sore head. Step one, get dressed; step two, eat; step three, get the hell out.

I nodded. This was a good plan. It was so simple it might just work. My course decided on, I delved into my bag and retrieved a pair of black heels with ruffle/flower things down the front, a grey t-shirt that said 'I get what I want," a pair of black skinnies and a cropped blazer. A few swipes of black eyeliner, mascara and bright red lipstick aaand…..there. I felt much less vulnerable now.  
>I turned to look at the full-length mirror in the cupboard and was blinded, once again, by the stupid sun and its reflective light. Sunglasses, I needed sunglasses <em>now<em>. I dug around in my bag and found them sandwiched between an old bra that was too comfortable to get rid of, and a picture of my sister and me.

_Don't look, don't look at it. Don't even touch it. Get your sunnies and get out._

But I didn't even need to look; I had already seen it so many times before it was fixed in my brain. Daisy had taken it. It had been right before my sister's first high school dance; our faces were pressed together in a way that was both cute and completely unattractive. I loved that photo, I loved how after it was taken Daisy and I snuck into the dance to watch what happened, and were nearly caught by one of the chaperones. It was one of my favourite memories.

It was ruined. Totally ruined by the way they'd cut me out of our- their group. Cut me out of their lives, ripped themselves out of mine. And now my mascara was running and if I wasn't careful someone would come up and find me like this.

There was a high pitched shrieking down stairs that sent a battering ram to my head. _Dear god, who has a phone that loud? And why is no one answering the fucking thing?_ Ugh, the pain in my head was squeezing more tears out of me, and I couldn't figure out where I'd find a tissue and-

Footsteps on the stairs. Fuck, someone was coming.

Squinting so much I looked half Asian, I swiped my fingers under my eyes and batted my lashes in an attempt to dry them. I pushed my sunnies down and cursed under my breath, before flinging things into drawers and cupboards at random.

"Anastasia?" called Charlie through the door.

"I'll be out in a minute, I'm just getting dressed!" I yelled far too loudly, trying to ram the desk drawer shut.

"Uh, okay. When you're decent, your father's on the phone."

Movement ceased, and an old pair of shorts that I'd flung into the air flopped softly down on my lower back. Dad. Dad could answer everything. If I was in a dream, then that was the downstairs phone, and I'd wake up soon. If not… dad would come and get me. I don't know how I got here or how he found me, but he'd come and get me.

Shoving the rest of the junk on the floor under the desk, I wrenched the door open and barrelled past a very surprised looking Charlie.

Flying down the stairs and across the room, I swivelled around wildly. I felt sea sick, and I couldn't see the phone. That thing was my key to salvation, and I couldn't fucking see it.

"The phone's there, on the table to your right," said an amused looking Billy from the kitchen doorway. I snatched the receiver, "Daddy?" I panted. "Daddy? Are you there?"

"Yes I'm here, Anja. Are you alright?"

"I, um," I swallowed hard and tried to breathe. "I'm fine I think." Shit, he's probably about to lecture me about running away. I don't care; I was getting out of here! He may ground me for the rest of my life but I was going t get out of this nightmare.

"Alright then. How was your flight?" _What?! My flight? Where the fuck would I have flown t- Boston to Forks. I'd got on a PLANE and FLOWN from Boston to fucking Forks! _

"Um, I can't really remember it," was my halted response. _Fuck. It was real. This whole thing was fucking real. I was inside Twilight. I was in Forks. Sweet mother of God what was happening?!_

"You were probably asleep for most of it. You looked so tired when we said goodbye. Chief Swan says you went straight to sleep when he got you home."

Charlie Swan picked me up from the airport, which I had flown to. Charlie Swan, a _fictional character_ had driven me to his house, which wasn't supposed to exist. Charlie Swan knew my dad, and was in the next room.

"Uh, yeah, I woke up a little while ago." My head was spinning even more. _I think I'm going to be sick._

"Well it looks like it might be a blue moon tonight then," I heard the smile in my dad's voice. He was teasing me about my late-rising habits. I was stuck inside a teen novel, in Charlie fucking Swan's house, and my dad was acting like everything was as it should be.

"Dad, where are you?" I didn't know whether I wanted to have a tantrum or just run. _How _could this happen? How could they let it happen?

"Still in Boston. I've just got to wrap a few more things up at the office, but we'll be with you in two weeks Anja, don't worry. We've wired some money into your bank card so you can take care of the basics and a car. Your mom's finding a house, and your sister is just getting her transcript together. We've taken care of yours already; you'll be ready to start school at Forks High right on time."

"Forks High?" I sounded so dumb, repeating stuff like that.

"We've been over this Anastasia," he was getting impatient. My father was getting impatient because I couldn't comprehend the fact that I was in a _fictional world!_ "I know it's a public school," he continued, "but their results are fantastic and there's a dance studio an hour away where you're set to start."

"Uh….." Oh god. What now. This was real. It was all real.

There was shuffling and mumbled voices on the other end. "I'm sorry Anja but I have to go- your mom will call tonight to see how you're doing."

There were so many things I wanted to ask him, but everyone was probably eavesdropping from the kitchen and I was just too confused right now to find a logical question.

"Oh. Okay."

"Bye."

"Love you. See you soon," I said. He hung up.

_Shit._

This wasn't a dream, this was actually real. I was moving here because dad wanted to … well I didn't say but it was definitely him that was behind this move, because my mother _hated_ small towns. I was like her in that way; I loved the city. The buzz, the people, everything. It was impossible to be alone with nothing to do there. There were so many distractions you never had to be lumped with your thoughts. You could always leave reality behind.

"Anastasia?" I turned to Charlie. "Are you alright? You look a little shaken."

I nodded and plastered a smile on my mouth, "yeah, just hungry."

He grinned, "well come on, I've got some cereal in the kitchen. After breakfast we can take you out to see Forks."

_Yeah, that'll take around five minutes. _Following him, trying to form an adequate escape plan, it occurred to my body that I had just flown across the country. Jacob and Billy were still here, looking at me in fascination as my body set about draining the adrenaline from my blood and replacing it with melatonin. Next stop; moody, catatonic and totally lost.

"Did you come for the cereal too?" I asked dryly.

Jacob laughed much louder than necessary, but I smiled all the same. Good to know my wit was appreciated, even in fictional worlds. What am I saying? This is twilight- wit was practically a foreign concept!

"Well I wouldn't eat anything he'd actually cooked!" laughed Billy at an insensitive decibel. I officially didn't like him. Charlie merely laughed and turned to one of the old laminated cupboards.

"I have bran flakes, and Count Chocula.

_You have got to be fucking with me. Oh the painful irony._

"I'm guessing Count Chocula?" smiled Charlie. I could only nod. The whole world was out to drive me insane.

Charlie looked slightly less friendly, and I realised my unresponsiveness wasn't the most polite attitude. Fuck that, I was tired, hungry, confused; in short, I was past caring.

I took the bowl from his hands, vaguely pleased he'd put the correct amount of milk in.

"Thanks, Mr Swan," I mumbled.

The wooden chairs were battered and slightly damp. The table wasn't much better. The bowl he'd given me was plastic, and the spoon had water spots on it. Clearly he didn't entertain. Or care about presentation.

"So Anastasia," started Jake the Perky Perv. "Are you staying in Forks long?"

_Not if I can help it._ "I'm not sure. My parents haven't exactly filled me in."

"Really? When your father talked to me, it sounded like a permanent type of move," said Charlie.

_Please God no. _"Perhaps. We'll see how my mom copes with being in such a small town."

"If you're looking for a place to live, there are a few pieces of land in La Push," commented Billy. Apparently, he was a real estate agent now.

"I'll mention it." This milk tasted weird. If I got food poisoning, that would be the last straw. I'd officially take leave of my senses and steal the police cruiser to escape.

"Well if you're going to Forks High that might not be the ideal location." And Charlie wanted to be an estate agent too. And apparently liked to eavesdrop.

"My mom's looking into it I think."

"Oh well that sorts that out. If she needs any help-"

"I'll direct her in your direction," I finished with a tight smile. _Just let me finish my goddamn cereal so I can go and shove your estranged daughter's stuff back into drawers._

There was a brief silence as I battled down mouthfuls of chocolate carbs with as little milk as possible.

"Do you know anyone in town besides Charlie?" piped up Jake.

"No." I was about to go back to my cereal, but I realised this may be my only chance to get one particular question answered. "In fact," I continued, "I'm sorry, but I'm not sure how I know Chief Swan." I threw him an apologetic smile. "My dad probably told me, but I've forgotten."

"Your father came down here every other summer when we were young. We would sometimes go out with friends together, and he was around the summer that I got married. He even attended the wedding."

What. The actual. Fuck.

"Oh. I see." I went back to fishing cereal out of my bowl. My father, the man born in a suit, self-made man, and big-time advertising head for Apple; used to holiday in Forks. Now my math was rusty, but something wasn't quite adding up here.

"Summer in here is great; the sun shines, there's not as much rain, and there are bonfires all the time," said Jake wistfully.

"You got here on a good day," said Billy. "The sun is shining much brighter than usual."

_Specifically just to hurt my eyes and piss me off._

"You'll get used to the weather soon," added Charlie. "Maybe even learn to like it," he laughed, nudging me. I let out an unamused 'ha'.

I needed to get out of here. Maybe if I somehow caused a distraction in the kitchen, I could run to the cruiser and get away. I knew they had trackers in those things, but I didn't need to steal it, just borrow it until I got to Seattle.

God where was a cab when you needed them? I was starting to feel nauseous again, only this time I could taste the stench of bile in my throat. I was actually physically ill.

_Well considering your usual nausea after flying, the probability of that milk being sour, and factoring in how you JUST WOKE UP IN A FICTIONAL WORLD, are you really surprised?_

"Um, may I be excused? I just need to-" my innards heaved and my mouth clamped shut. The chair screamed as it scraped the floor. There was another heave, and my hand was on my mouth.

The stairs tried to trip me up and the bathroom door was suddenly stiff, but I made it.

After gifting the porcelain God with my breakfast, I rolled over to the side and balled myself up into the foetal position.  
>I was in Forks. I was In <em>Twilight<em>. Tati wasn't here. My parents weren't going to come and pick me up, they were going to _move_ here. I had no way of knowing how I got here, or how the fuck I was going to get out. I was hung over, and this house was freezing. My friends had just disowned me, right after I caught my boyfriend cheating, and I probably had food poisoning.

Fuck, I hate my life. When had everything gotten so utterly screwed up? When had I been reduced to a mess of hot tears and angst? I was crying in earnest. My nose was dribbling, my lip was shaking, and the horrible stink of vomit was not helping my nausea. Flushing the toilet, I wobbled over to the sink and clung to it. The girl in the mirror had a red nose, smudged lipstick, and three black streaks on her cheeks. I wiped the tears away, gave a final sniff, and pushed up my sunnies so they sat like a second set of eyes on my head. Then I addressed my reflection, like I always did when I'd fallen apart. "You are going to be ok. You are going to fix your make-up, put away the shit in Bella's room, and then you are going on a tour of Forks. But before any of that, you are going to rinse out your mouth, brush your teeth, and go make nice with the fictional characters."

The reflection understood, and together we set out doing these things. I hunted down some mouth wash and toothpaste. While descending the stairs, I heard Billy making fun of a worried Charlie in the kitchen.

"I told you, you need to check expiry dates every week," said Billy. "Otherwise you end up poisoning your guests more than usual."

"But it only expires today- besides, the fridge keeps it colder and it lasts longer. Maybe she's lactose intolerant."

"Um, no," I interrupted. "I'm still a bit queasy from the jetlag, that's all." _And have a hangover that would kill an Elephant. God, I'll never drink again. Ever.  
>Wait, maybe that's the way to get out of this mess! I'll replicate my actions and then I'll get back home. Unless it's like what happened in '<em>What women want'_, then I've got to get electrocuted or something.  
><em>However eating chocolate and getting drunk in my room was probably not something people did often in Forks. Charlie may interrupt me or something and screw it all up. Damn you Charlie!

"You feeling queasy again?" asked Charlie. Perhaps he was worried that I'd not make it to the bathroom this time and just throw up right there. He probably didn't know how to properly clean a floor, so I understood his fear.

I shook my head and relaxed my brow, "I'm fine. If you let me get my bag, I'd like to get that tour now."

He smiled, and nodded. I decided it would be good to just stuff everything into the closet for now, and then tidy up properly later. There is only so much time a girl can spend looking for her bag after all.

Jacob and Billy had to head back, so I said it was nice to meet them and waved goodbye. See? Playing nice. Charlie got his keys and led me outside. I gripped the hand-rail, not sure just how polite the driveway was going to be. It was a gentleman though, and let me get all the way to the cruiser. I waited for a second as Charlie approached. He was going on the wrong side. The lights flashed so I knew the car was unlocked, but Charlie only opened his door and slid into the driver's seat.

_Oh, right. You open your own doors here. Going to have to get used to that._

Charlie pulled out and told me that seeing as his house was close to the town centre, he was going to drive to the outskirts and then show me around. I nodded and told him that sounded good, even though I wasn't quite certain his plan made sense. I was in a car, and there had to be some blunt object in here I could hit him with. I'd had to be careful though, assaulting an officer wouldn't be taken lightly. And then there was still the issue of driving with him either still in the seat, or trying to drag him out the car. Maybe If I told him I saw some randoms lighting up in a woody area (ie, anywhere on the side of the road), he'd get out, and I'd be able to skid into his seat and drive off.

"So what do you want to do until your folks get here?"

"Hmm?"

"Well your parents aren't going to be here for another week-"

"Two weeks," I corrected. Fourteen days. …a lot of hours. God, could I survive that long without Tati? I'd done it for longer before, but I was so confused by everything right now. I needed her here so she could tell me what the hell was happening.

"Well I'm guessing that, charming as I am, you don't want to spend the whole time with me," laughed Charlie.

I smiled weakly, "well I guess I'll get a better idea after I've seen what's here. I do need to get a car though."

"Well if you need a car, you don't have to spend anything," said Charlie.

"Um, you're suggesting I commit grand-theft auto?" What the hell? I knew this town was crazy, but he was a cop for crying in a bucket!

He chuckled loudly, "I'm fairly certain they'd have my badge for even joking about that."

I nodded, still lost. Where was this guy's logic?

"No, what I meant was that Billy has a truck he's trying to get rid of. He'd give it to you, no problem. Wouldn't even need to get it checked out- Jake's as good as any mechanic."

Ah, so the death trap was still around.

"As tempting as that sounds, my dad would probably shudder at the thought of a used car. He just doesn't think they're as safe, you know?"

Alright, dad was okay with having a second hand car (this was Forks after all), but I didn't like the idea at all. It just didn't seem as safe, and, let's face it, I didn't know what had happened in that car. I didn't like not knowing the stories behind all the scratches and stains. It creeped me out to think that someone may have died, lost their virginity, or thrown up in my back seat. I mean, ew! Who wanted to be driving around, not knowing (or knowing, depending on stains) that someone had taken a different kind of ride in there? No thank you.

"Ah well I suppose that's his opinion, and if he wants to spend the money…"

I tuned out as he went on about car safety and used cars and miles driven. I could see a road ahead and I'm betting that was the sign saying 'welcome to Forks'.

Wait- nope. Just another road sign. God, where was this town? Was it so small that the trees totally hid it?

"Um, when exactly are we going to see the town?" I asked.

"Soon, soon. I'm just going a little more to the side so we don't start in the centre of town. We'll get there, don't worry," he chuckled. I waited for a few minutes, and lo and behold, buildings started to appear. Old, seemingly empty buildings. Dear heaven, this place was a dump. The road was all worn, nothing was shiny and new, paint was peeling off everything. Oh, and it was one big trailer park, oh I'm sorry, RV. I wasn't sure whether to run or write them a cheque. This town needed a serious facelift. And a nose job. And more than likely a tummy tuck. I wasn't one to advocate surgery but this place was awful. Ugh I _so _don't want to be here! I wondered if James was around. Where would he be at this point? Maybe I could get him here somehow and persuade him to eat me. Drink me. Whatever. Then again, death had never been high on my priority list. And my family was moving here- they'd have to deal with the death. And my funeral.

"Sorry you had to see that part of Forks first," said Charlie. "But I thought I'd show the worst first, save the best for last and all."

_Wait what?_ So that was the dodgy part of Forks? "So that part of town was…?"

"Because of the recession, and a few killer storms recently, folks haven't had much time to fix things up properly. The rain makes things look worse than they really are."

Two seconds later, and I was in a very different place. What. The hell. There were still tacky buildings with what looked like metal walls, but there were so many lovely ones of wood, with old colonial styling. Everything was a bit sludgy if you looked too closely, but pretty green otherwise, with nice paint jobs. All in all…. It was cute. It even had a bowling alley that looked like it was still stuck in the sixties. I couldn't believe myself, but I found the little town with its plebeian populace adorable. It was like one of those little animated kids' shows where every week you learn some valuable life lesson. And there were so many buildings! I couldn't actually get over the size of this place; it was like expecting a prawn and ending up with a lobster!

Charlie had been pointing out various landmarks to me- apparently Forks was 115 years old, which surprised me. I'd thought with that amount of time it might have been a little bit more interesting.

_Don't judge too soon; the little people here probably think it's very important. Don't mess with the natives. _

"And there's the welcome sign."

Why would a welcome sign be in the middle of town? That was just stupid. This place was stupid. It may be kinda cute, but it was still Forks.

The car started slowing, and Charlie told me to get out.

"Wh-what?" I hadn't said anything mean about his little town! Nothing! And he couldn't hear my thoughts, right? What the hell was going on?

"Let's take a picture of you with the sign. We'll e-mail it to your folks tonight and show them how well you're doing."

You could have knocked me over with a feather. What would my parents want with a picture of me next to some gross, mouldy sign? Charlie had already gotten out the car and was searching his pockets for a camera; it was a pretty good quality digital too. Huh, maybe some city-friend had sent it to him as a gift. Grudgingly I followed instructions, tip toeing across the damp grass, trying not to get my heels stuck. There weren't many cars about. The only person I saw was inside a store getting ready to open I guess, but Charlie helped me cross the road, holding my hand like I was five or something. We got to the sign, and only then did he let go of my hand, needing two to operate his camera. He walked backwards so he got everything in the shot, and told me to 'strike a pose'.

I smiled, leaned against the sign, and hoped that I could run across the road faster than him. I'd probably manage it as long as the road stayed empty, and I ditched my shoes.

Charlie said I was a natural, and stood by the side of the road like a sentinel.

I looked down and started to pull my shoe off, apologising that I had to leave them on the side of a road in Forks. What choice did I have though? If my parents were coming, then they'd only get here in two weeks. If they weren't, which was more likely given the fictional situation I was in, then I needed to get out. Preferably now.

"You ok there?" called Charlie, the second I had my other shoe off. I looked up to make sure the road was clear before I ran, but Charlie was barely two feet from me. I lifted my shoes, ready to throw them at him, but his concerned expression made me baulk. I looked behind me, expecting someone dead or dying, but saw nothing.

"Did you hurt yourself? I didn't like the look of those shoes, but I figured you city girls wore them all the time," he hurried over and lifted up my foot. I was stunned- he thought I was injured? His first reaction when he saw me with my shoes off, leaning towards the road, was that I was injured?

"No, no I'm fine. I just- um," _I just, um, what? Planning to steal your car and drive to Seattle with it?_

"I wanted to feel the grass beneath my feet. You don't often get to do that in Boston."

Charlie seemed appeased, "well put them back on then, we have a lot to see."

_Great, my one chance at getting the hell out of here, and I blew it. Brilliant, Anja. _

"Let's get another shot of you next to the Tree House."

"What?" I asked, sliding my foot back into my lovely shoes. It was lucky that the grass hadn't been too soggy, because then I'd have muddy feet. Charlie led me back across the road, and drove me further into town (there were actually buildings shoulder to shoulder on both sides of the street). Parking in the lot for the transport centre, he walked me across the street (what is with this man and holding my hand?) to a tree trunk under a roof which was wider than I was tall. It had a sign nailed to it, giving some information on the logging history of forks ('Forks; logging capitol of the world!'). Charlie was snap-happy, taking pictures of me reading the sign, turning around to see what the hell he was doing, pulling a confused face that clearly said 'wtf, Charlie?' and then finally giving the tree a hug. I mean, what other pose is possible with a huge tree? As I surveyed the rest of the town, Charlie was going through the pictures and telling me what fun we would have today, and over the next three weeks. I turned around when he abruptly said to 'look sharp.' What the hell did that mean? There wasn't anyone to look sharp for, and we weren't doing anything secretive.

"Morning Mayor Byron," called Charlie, giving a small wave to a portly fellow in a tweed suite. He looked like the Italian chef in the logo for my favourite pizza place.

"Morning Charlie!" he sang back as he came down the street. "This must be our new resident, Miss Knightley."

Ah, so that's what he meant. "'Look sharp,' the Mayor of our fair town is coming our way, and as I'm chief of police, you'd better not make me look bad." I smiled and went over to shake hands with another fictional character. Before you knew it, I'd look like Alice and Forks would turn into Wonderland.'

"Pleasure to meet you, Mr Mayor," I said, sweet as apple-pie.

"And you, Miss Knightly," He shook my hand firmly, but it was still soft due to his well-padded fingers. There was a few moments of polite chit-chat where I told him how pretty Forks was, and he said he knew I'd love it here.

_Shows how much you know. _

"Well I'm sorry I can't stay and chat, I just wanted a quick word with Chief Swan here, but I'll see him about it later," he smiled widely. Clearly his campaign manager had advised him to do it widely and frequently.

"Oh no, please go ahead, I'll just wait in the car," I hurried out. I was about to get a second chance at escaping and I was not going to give it up.

"No, no, it's really unimportant," he said with a chuckle. I was backing towards the car even now.

"Oh no, please, I insist."

"No, no I couldn't possibly-" he stopped talking once he realised I wasn't listening, to focused on walking towards the car at a normal pace. I couldn't run now, that would look fishy.

I looked both ways before crossing the street like a good little girl, going through the route we'd travelled before in my head. I was pretty sure I could find my way out. I just needed to stay on the high-way. Simple. I could do this.

The car was unlocked. Better yet, the keys were in the ignition; thank you, small town naivety. A quick glance to make sure that they were still talking, paying no attention to me. I took stock of what I had to work with- old manual, with weird looking pedals. _Breathe, breathe, you can do this. You have GOT to do this._ I buckled up, took a deep breath, and started the engine. The men looked my way, curious. I started backing out of the spot, but this car was stiff, and I couldn't see out of it properly. Alright, I wasn't a great driver yet, but I passed my test first time. Charlie said something hastily to the Mayor, and I turned the thing around and headed for the road. Chief Swan was running towards me now, and I was panicking. This wasn't nearly as easy as I'd planned. The wheel was heavy, and I would need to pass Charlie on my way out. He knew this, and was already half way to the entrance to the car park. I gunned the engine, trying to beat him there. He seemed to know what I was doing though, and jumped in the road.

_Shit shit shit! I can't kill someone! Especially not a cop! Fuck that, he's not real- keep going! No- he's still alive in this world! Oh God! This was so much more successful in my head. Fuck, maybe I could swerve-?_  
>I was nearly on Charlie, and I didn't trust myself not to accidentally run him over. Real or not real, that would be bad. Fuck, I wasn't going to make it. I made a frustrated sound that was annoyingly high-pitched, and slowed down. He leaned into the window as I pulled up to him, concern in his eyes but those thick eyebrows were making an intimidating 'V' on his forehead.<p>

"Just, ah, bringing the car around for you," I said, voice cracking on the last syllable so it sounded like a question. I am such a failure. I can't drive a car when my sanity, and possibly my life, depends on it.

"I'm sure you were," he said. After a second of looking at me, he cleared his throat and pointed to the seat. "Can I get in?"

"Oh! Sure, I'll just, uh-" oh God, I'm an idiot. Why did I think I could do this? I got out and walked around to my seat. It felt like a walk of shame, and I had the hang-over to go with it. There was no attempt at conversation until Charlie started telling me about the totem poles that started cropping up. I pretended nothing had happened, chiming in now and then with questions.

"Want to see your new school?" he asked after there had been a small silence.

"Yeah, that'd be great," I said. Minutes later we were in front of a huge, burgundy building. It was kinda pretty. Those white stones that edged the corners, all the green trees and shrubs around it.

"You don't really want to be here, do you?"

My head audibly snapped in Charlie's direction. Well he was a cop; he made a living out of noticing things and reading people. There was no point in denying it now- my reaction was answer enough. If I wanted to find out what was going on though, I'd probably do better not to say I outright despised my position (geographically as well and circumstantially).

"I'm just… confused," I compromised. "I don't know…. what's going to happen."

_Or how I got here, or WHY I am here, or exactly how this is at all POSSIBLE._

Charlie nodded. Silence.

"I'm sorry I tried to steal your cruiser," I said. May as well admit it.

He chuckled softly, still looking straight ahead. "I'm not sure what you thought you'd achieve by it. Those things don't exactly blend in. And it's easily traced, what with the radios and all."

I smiled slightly, "Yeah, I knew that. I figured if I could just get to Port Angeles, I could ditch it there and get on a plane. You foiled my plan when you jumped in the road though."

"You're that desperate to get home?" I wasn't sure whether it was pity, or incredulity that dimmed his smile.

I shrugged, "I'm just…" I didn't know what to say. Lost? Insane? Charlie didn't know he was a fictional character, so how could he possibly understand how confused I was. "Tired," I finished. It was what every teenager said when they couldn't, or wouldn't, express themselves.

Charlie nodded, even though it clearly made no sense. The silence stretched out again, like a cat in a patch of sun.

"School starts in a week and a bit," he said abruptly.

"Oh," I said. "Probably should get a car before then. Don't want to steal yours again."

He chuckled, "committing a felony wouldn't be a good way to start here."

"Oh I don't know; it would give people something to talk about. The trouble making new girl staying with Chief Swan- may even make the headlines."

His deep laugh got slightly louder, "I'd never hear the end of it- a criminal under my own roof."

I giggled, "You could come to the dark side with me; I'd give you cookies."

We laughed, but it died down quickly.

"Look Anastasia," He said, clearing his throat. "I know I'm not the most open person, and we don't know each other well but- Well if you want to talk about… being homesick or something, I'm here. I mean, I can't say I'll be much help but if you want to talk about your uh, feelings, I'm happy to listen." He was trying so hard, and it made me smile. I leaned over and hugged him, just to let him know he didn't have to keep talking.

"Thanks Charlie, it means a lot," I said. The poor man clearly had problems with emotional expression, but I had plenty of issues myself. He patted my head awkwardly, but I think he liked being hugged. Probably reminded him of Bella.

"I should probably show you the rest of Forks," he said after I let go.

I nodded, and my stomach rumbled. "After that, do you mind if we stop and get something to eat?" He smiled and nodded, "should probably stop off at the supermarket anyway."

My head twinged, graciously reminding me of my killer hang-over. "We need olive oil too," I cringed, massaging my temples. Charlie looked confused, but said nothing.

The rest of the tour was uneventful. We stayed in the car, and Charlie told me a few stories about some of the places we passed. Turns out the town of Forks is pretty big, but had a lot of people in outlying areas. That said, I don't think it took more than an hour to get anywhere. We stopped and got sandwiches and drinks at the Shell garage, then kept going. Although I didn't quite understand it, Charlie was really proud of this town. He was so excited (in his own, quiet way of course), that he practically refused to stop for more than a few minutes. We drove so much, I had to ask him to pull over so that I could stretch my legs and wake up my butt. By the time the sun started going down, I'd seen every blade of grass in Forks, and most of La Push too. It was a wonder I'd not started voicing my sarcasm, because there are only so many trees you can see before remarking on how _totally different _every single one is_._ I managed to keep my grumpiness to myself, but with a hang-over and an empty stomach, there wasn't much I could do besides try to keep my mouth shut.

"I think we'd better get some dinner in us, and head home," said Charlie. I couldn't have agreed more. Charlie took me to The Lodge. A grill right next to the 'Tree house' I saw this morning. The place was like an old, musty, _horribly_ tacky hunting lodge. There were at least three moose-heads mounted on the wall, faded sienna wallpaper, and dodgy lighting. Luckily my hang-over bid me goodbye around midday, so the loud obnoxious music didn't bother me. Charlie seemed to be on good terms with the wait-staff; they greeted each other by name, asking about family and jobs and bunions.

"I take it you come here often?"

Charlie looked a bit sheepish, "I don't do much in the way of cooking, and what I do is rarely edible."

I giggled, remembering how Bella had to play house-wife. "Sorry to say this, but I've not much experience in the kitchen myself. It looks like we'll be living on take-out and ready-made meals."

Whether the service was good, or Charlie got preferential treatment, we ordered and had our food within thirty minutes. My burger was so big, I didn't even attempt to try shoving it in my mouth. I felt so prissy cutting it up, but there really was no other way. It was good, not the best I'd had obviously, but I could get used to eating it. Charlie seemed to be on friendly terms with most of the people in Forks (Forkians? Forkers? Forkish?), half of which seemed to have crammed themselves into the grill for dinner. We had a near constant stream of people coming by. It was like a dance routine; say hi to Charlie, polite small talk about something local or personal; suddenly notice me, and question me on Boston, when I got here. Quick laugh when I tell them it was this morning, and tell me some trivial information about themselves before saying they 'really should be getting back' to their own bloody table.

During this time I met Mrs Newton (the woman was a poster child for toothpaste), Mr Mason (my English teacher), Mayor Byron said hello again with his wife (lovely woman, can't stop saying 'luv-er-leh'). Then there were the Smiths with their three kids, another police officer whose name came out with such a broad Chicagoan accent I didn't understand a word he said, and then a sweet old bat who had apparently been his nanny. She came past, made polite chit-chat, mistook me for her niece, berated me for not calling ahead, and then promptly went back to see if her potatoes had cooled.

By the time my peach cobbler arrived I was exhausted.

"Sorry about old Mrs Faust. She misplaces her glasses half the time and can't see clearly without them. Lovely woman though," he said, still tearing into his chocolate pie.

I 'hmmed' in response. I was tired, thoroughly agitated, and I refused to cause a scene with half the townsfolk in here. It was bad enough I would have to live with them for the foreseeable future, I didn't want to have to deal with their gossip too.

We drove home, and I tried to ignore the scenery. The trees were tall and seemingly endless, looking more like an army of shadows than a forest. The dim lights that dotted the road did little, and it was all so quiet. It was like a post-apocalyptic world, totally dead. A deer ran into the road and I screamed bloody murder. I was glad to see something alive, but Christ it nearly made me pee my pants! Charlie seemed more spooked by me than the deer. After I got a grip, silence reigned again until we pulled up to his house. It seemed to have warmed up a bit during the day, which was nice. Charlie went straight to the TV, and watched the news and whatever sport was on. I headed up to shower and brush my teeth. The water warmed up quickly, thank heaven, and it was so nice to get into my pyjamas afterwards. The mirror was pretty small, which I hadn't really notice before, but it served its purpose.

Once again in the purple lair, I half-heartedly cleaned up the mess I'd made in my panic that morning. I found a few spare coat hangers and unpacked a bit, then went hunting for my cell again, finding it in my shoe, again. I plugged it in, keyed in the code, and waited impatiently for it to turn on. No new messages. None. I scrolled through my old conversations- there were a few new ones from Aiden, but I'd already opened them. When I don't know, but I didn't know much these days. Ugh, he didn't even have the decency to grovel; he just told me I was a stupid bitch and I was lucky to have him. Then he went on to say that he'd been seeing the whore for over a month. God I'd been so stupid!

Nothing new from dad. Nothing from mom. I couldn't bring myself to check Daisy, Jayd or Georgie. Tati had sent me a few things. Mostly asking how my day was- I'd replied? Wha-? HOLY SHIT! These messages were from over a week ago! How had over a week of my life gone by without my knowledge? Better yet, how the HELL had I ended up here? Oh God. I was too tired to deal with this. I needed to go to sleep, and then hopefully I'd wake up, and all of this would be a bad dream. A horrible nightmare that I would laugh at later with Tati. Then I suppose I'd go out with friends- real friends –and start getting over the horrible night I had.

Charlie knocked on the door, and I turned over my phone; it raised more questions than answers.

"Come in," I called.

"Hey Anastasia," he said softly. "Just wanted to make sure you were alright. You think you'll get to sleep ok?"

I smiled, "yeah, I'm fine."

_Aside from discovering I've lost over a week of my life, I'm just peachy keen, thanks._

Charlie nodded, and went to open the window.

"It's hot tonight, you'll want this open, trust me," he said. Then he paused. He seemed to be looking at the walls with great interest.

"Um, Charlie, as interesting as it is to watch, I'm pretty sure the paint has been dry for a while now."

"Oh, right. I was just thinking how long it took to paint this room. Your dad told me you liked purple, and I figured it might be a nice surprise for Bella. Bella's my daughter," he said, turning to me. "She may be visiting me next year."

The way he was looking at me… It was like he was asking me to say something. What, I wasn't sure. Did he want me to tell him Bella would love it? That I'm sure she'd visit soon?

"Yeah I was wondering who's tutu was hanging in there," I waved a hand towards the closet.

Charlie smiled, "yeah, she never did like ballet. Her mom and I thought it might do her some good to stick with it, but Bella always had a mind of her own."

He was still looking at me like that. Ugh, what do I say?

"So um, when would Bella come next year?"

"For part of summer vacation. She used to come up every year until she was fourteen, but her mom got tired of driving her, and I guess Bella…"

"I'm sure it was just a phase," I interjected. "The tweenie years are tough, and it can't be easy for anyone to be in one place and then another. It's like she's living in two worlds; yours and your wife's."

He nodded, and bid me goodnight. I did the same, and was surprised when he turned out the light and shut the door on his way out.

_So I can't have the car door opened for me, but you act as an automatic light switch? This town is weird._

Lying there, in Bella Swan's bed in a fictional house, I was consistently thinking of one question; why couldn't I have fallen into Harry Potter? Granted I'd be supremely ticked off if I was just a mere Muggle, but it would be infinitely better than being here.

_But if I were a Muggle, I wouldn't know Harry's world was real, would I? Unless I was part of a wizarding family or something. That would still be pretty cool, but I'd probably get really bitter really quickly if I couldn't do magic. Guess I'll never know, seeing as I've fallen into Stephenie Meyer's hormonal dream where she plays a goody-goody, sex-crazed virgin trying to get into a freaking _vampire's_ pants._

There were some things I _needed_ to know though; like if Bella was going to show up. I'm not sure if I could take meeting a Mary-sue, face to perfect face. Meyer had written and set the book in 2004, so why was it still my time? Plus, why was I even here in the first place? The reason my dad was moving us here, and the reason I'd landed up in one of the most poorly written teen novels of all time. There had to be a reason. Right?

Right?


End file.
